My spark of life was gone

It felt hopeless.
Another back injury.
The fourth one.
I’ve stopped asking myself “Why me” several years ago, but I was still depressed that it happened to me one more time.

I tried to do some training, but it just increased the pain in the neck and head.
That furious pain.
Even worse than migraine.
It made me want to grab the ax to chop off the head to get rid of the pain.
No pain killers helped.
All the rehab training I knew from my earlier injuries didn’t work this time.

I lost the motivation for training.
I lost the motivation to have fun.
I just lost the motivation for life.
I didn’t want to die. I just didn’t want to live this life full of pain anymore.
My spark of life was gone.

It is World Suicide Prevention Day today (September 10th), and I want to raise awareness about how many people who live with physical pain can’t see another option other than suicide.

When the doctors don’t believe in you.
When your family can’t help you.
When there is no one there who can understand you.
When the darkness takes over your mind.
I know what it’s like.
I know that feeling.

That is why I am so passionate about helping other people to deal with their pain.
Because I know that it is possible to live a more valuable life.
I know that with more knowledge, you can start taking control of your pain.
I know that you can get understanding, love, and the knowledge that you are not alone with a community.
I know that life can be absolutely fantastic.

You are not alone! ❤️

With love, Cattis ❤️

PS. Take a look at the Tiktok-video I made today about this topic.