mental health

My spark of life was gone

It felt hopeless.
Another back injury.
The fourth one.
I’ve stopped asking myself “Why me” several years ago, but I was still depressed that it happened to me one more time.

I tried to do some training, but it just increased the pain in the neck and head.
That furious pain.
Even worse than migraine.
It made me want to grab the ax to chop off the head to get rid of the pain.
No pain killers helped.
All the rehab training I knew from my earlier injuries didn’t work this time.

I lost the motivation for training.
I lost the motivation to have fun.
I just lost the motivation for life.
I didn’t want to die. I just didn’t want to live this life full of pain anymore.
My spark of life was gone.

It is World Suicide Prevention Day today (September 10th), and I want to raise awareness about how many people who live with physical pain can’t see another option other than suicide.

When the doctors don’t believe in you.
When your family can’t help you.
When there is no one there who can understand you.
When the darkness takes over your mind.
I know what it’s like.
I know that feeling.

That is why I am so passionate about helping other people to deal with their pain.
Because I know that it is possible to live a more valuable life.
I know that with more knowledge, you can start taking control of your pain.
I know that you can get understanding, love, and the knowledge that you are not alone with a community.
I know that life can be absolutely fantastic.

You are not alone! ❤️

With love, Cattis ❤️

PS. Take a look at the Tiktok-video I made today about this topic. 

Do you want to get stronger?

Do you want to get more well-trained? Like really easy? 
Would you let someone else go to the gym for you?
I guess you don’t; you know you have to do the work yourself. 

So do you do work out for your brain? 🧠
Maybe you even think that it’s not for you?! 😱

Let me tell you a story about my client, who was a promising elite athlete.
Her trainer wasn’t interested in listening to her talking about her mental health issues.
He just wanted her to do the training in his way, with a restricted food diet,
to lose weight so that she could be even more fit (she was well-trained and fit).
She struggled with all of this, couldn’t find the motivation, and her self-esteem was getting lower and lower each time the trainer told her she wasn’t good enough, fit enough, that she had to stop feeling so much. 

When she started as my client, she thought that she wasn’t worthy of winning or being in a bigger team. She thought she was too fat (she was not!). 
She thought she couldn’t get any better due to her mental health issues. 

Of course, this was what she thought. The trainer had told her this over and over again, 
and when you hear things often, you start to believe in that, even though it isn’t true. 

Her trainer didn’t like me because he thought I should only focus on her performance,
and make sure she reached her goals and making her stop eat coffee bread
(which she didn’t do very often).

I can’t work like that. I can’t focus on only one thing.
I work more holistic, see the whole perspective.
That is how you can get a real, valuable, and sustainable change.

When I started to work with her, I didn’t only focus on her performance in her sports,
I also focused on digging deeper down into the cause of her mental health issues. 
When we started to work with that cause, and when she started to understand her
feelings and emotions, she realized that her feelings and emotions weren’t there
to hurt her. When she could be ok with the feelings and emotions and managed to
put them aside at the races, we could focus on her performance and set new goals. 

She started to make great performances in her races.
She started to believe in herself again.
She wasn’t ashamed of her mental health issues anymore. 
She could stand up for herself against the trainer.
She could manage her mental health and being an elite athlete!

What do you want to achieve?

That is why I was glad to see Simone Biles during the Olympics,
talking about her mental health issues (not glad for her mental health issues, of course), 
and despite all the buzz around her, she managed to focus and get that bronze medal!

So, I am a mental and pain coach.
You can’t work with just one thing if the other isn’t with you.
I have worked with many elite athletes, but I have also worked with a lot of other people.
People like you and me, 
who want to achieve their dreams,
who want to control their pain,
who want to manage their stress.
Because it is all attached to each other and when you start working with them altogether,
real change is happening! I work with the body and mind; it all sticks together.

Why wouldn’t you want to achieve your dreams? 
Why wouldn’t you want to live a more valuable life?
Why wouldn’t you be worthy of that?
Have you been told that you shouldn’t dream that big because it’s not for you?
OMG! I can’t tell you how often I get to hear that! 🙈

How can anyone else tell you what you can’t do?

If I would have listened to everyone who told me what I couldn’t do,
or that my dreams were up in the blue and not realistic,
I would probably not even have lived today!
And I definitely wouldn’t have been helping others achieve their Olympic goals,
business dreams, or managing their physical pain. 🥇💰⚡️🙌

So why would you settle with less than what’s in your dreams?
I can’t do the job for you, but if you want a change, a real change,
I can help you to achieve that.

If you’re willing to step things up in life, I’m here for you!
If you’re willing to get the heck out of that comfort zone
and say f*** o** to mediocrity,
I’m the coach you’ve been looking for.

But what if…

Don’t come up with all the excuses. It’s only the fears trying to save you.
The brain does that, it talks a lot of BS, and it constantly lies to you!
But I can teach you how to pass by those fears and lies.
You’re going to recognize all the fears that have stopped you from achieving so many things in life.
And when you learn to manage it, you will ask yourself why you didn’t do this much earlier in life.
Are you ready for your next step in life?
Are you done with the brain’s BS once and for all?
Are you ready to take control over your life instead of everyone/everything else is controlling you?

How long are you going to wait to fulfill your dreams?
How long are you going to wait to take control over and manage the pain or the stress?
Don’t wait another week, month, year(s)…
Do it now!

I have new openings for 1:1 coaching clients now.
👉 Schedule your first coaching call here!
 👈

I’m right by the computer, ready to help you achieve your goals
and start living a more valuable life! 💕

Talk soon,
Cattis 🙌

Is it really possible to control the pain?

Woman holding black Sony Ps 4 game controller
Wouldn’t it be convenient if we could control the pain with a game controller?!

This is a question I get quite often when I talk about how to be the CEO of long term pain. Many thinks that controlling the pain means pain killers. It is not. Read my last blog post, Science holds my back, to get more information about why pain killers doesn’t help for long term pain.

But it is possible to control the pain. Is it easy? Well, you probably have to do some changes in your life to get there, and changes doesn’t always come easy. But is it worth it?! OH YES!!!

A healthy human wants a thousand things, a sick human only wants one thing.
Confusius

So what can you do to control your pain? First of all you have to work with acceptance. And acceptance doesn’t come just like that. You have probably hated your part of the body that is hurting all the time. Frankly, I thought that acceptance is the same thing as giving up. When I realized it is not and I start working with my acceptance I finally could stop that ongoing war inside my body and I could make my pain to my faithful companion instead of my hated enemy.
Acceptance is about not valuate your feelings and accept that it is what it is today, it doesn’t mean it have to be like this tomorrow, or next week, next month, next year…
You will actually save a lot of energy and negative feelings when you start working with acceptance.
This is also one of the hardest part to work with, that is why I have it as the first module in my program, Become the CEO of long term pain. Because it takes time and you’re going to realize that acceptance is within most areas of life, especially the life with long term pain.

Everyday life

Do you have a lot of pain today? Does the pain increase by your job, hobbies, cleaning the house, cooking dinner etc.?
If your answer is yes on any of these questions, I will ask you further questions. Is it worth the increased pain to do the things you want to do? If the answer is yes, perfect, you have made a choice and that means you will accept the increased pain as well. If the answer is no, what can you do about it? Can you change something of what you do to decrease the pain instead? Do you have to do it like you always have been doing things?

For me I have realized that being an entrepreneur is a very important step in my own pain management. Why? First of all, my passion is truly to help people to manage their own pain in a better way and get a more valuable and profitable life. So that is one of my biggest motivators! But also, when I am in charge of my own time I can schedule physical activity and recovery time every day. I can lay down on the sofa and take a nap when the extreme tiredness sets in. I can sleep a bit longer, as long as I don’t have an appointment of course, because I know that my sleep quality isn’t that good. For me working from 8-5 in an office with lots of noice, impressions, stress and maybe not even somewhere I can lay down during the day isn’t good for me. It ends up with I’m coming home and have no energy to do anything. Maybe not even cook a proper dinner and that will make my pain increase because our bodies needs decent food to take care of itself. Of course there might be employers who can give you these opportunities, but I will tell you, my pain levels overall has really decreased during the last three years as an online entrepreneur. So the worst thing that can happen to me is that I have to go back to an employment. I know it might sound crazy, but honestly, if you could decrease your pain levels would it be worth it to have a lower income for a while? For me the answer is definitely yes!

Pain journal

Woman in cerise blouse writing journal by hand

To understand what triggers your pain it is a good idea to write a pain journal. By reflecting and writing down what you have done during a day gives you the possibility to see a pattern when the pain increases and when it decreases. It is a really great and simple way to get control over your pain. It gives you knowledge about what your body reacts to, you are probably aware of the bigger things you do that increases your pain, but in this way you will also get knowledge about the small details during a day that can increase the pain. It makes it easier to schedule your week so when you know you are going to do something that most likely will increase your pain you can also schedule recovery time after that, in this way it is easier to get a better balance.

And the last thing I want to give you in the way of controlling your pain is, be persistent. It doesn’t happen over a night, if you don’t get results within a week, don’t give up. Remember how long you have lived with the pain!

As one of my clients in my pain program told me last week, “I am so glad you changed your 8 weeks course into a longer membership, because I realize that it will take some time to work with mindset, acceptance and all the other tools you share. And what if I didn’t have a flare up during the 8 weeks I wouldn’t have known how to really work with all these tools when it happened.” You can’t imagine how thankful I was to hear this. Because I know exactly what what she means.

Long term pain isn’t a quick fix. But it is possible to control the pain, but it’s only you who can do the work. I can provide you with tools, inspiration, knowledge, coaching and accountability, but I can’t do the job for you, but I can assure you I will be there to help you in your pain journey!
Do you want to hear more about if I am the right coach for you and how my digital programs can help you? Book a free of charge Discovery Call, it gives us both a possibility to get to know each other and see if we are a perfect match for working together.

Talk soon,
Cattis

Can you see it?

One woman in pink blouse dancing in a luxurious environment, one older woman on a bench reading a book with the cane leaning on her knee

When you look at these pictures, can you see something special?

Can you tell the difference between these two women? Besides the age.
Yes, that’s right, you see a happy and powerful woman, dancing in a luxurious environment (that’s me). And yes, you see a peaceful lady, reading a book at a bench in a park, with her cane leaning on her knee. But there is something else. Still doesn’t see it?

Can you really not see that I am in pain?

No, of course you can’t see it. The invisible pain, you can’t see it just by looking at a person. This constant pain that I am always having, every single day for 30 years, 24/7. I can’t tell you how many times I wished I had a “snap-on-plaster” to a leg, just to make people around me aware that I might need a seat on the bus or just not run in to me. I don’t want people to feel sorry for me, but I want people to be careful and respectful, because if someone push into my back can be devastating for me.

I made the pain to my faithful companion, but it took me many years before I was able to do that, to stop that inside war in my body where I had the pain as my hateful enemy.

I talked to a lot of physiotherapists and naprapats that I know, because I want to collaborate with them. I have a lot of knowledge about living with long term pain, they have lots of patients. But they tell me they don’t have that kind of patients. What?! Are you sure? You know that you have long term pain when you had the pain for at least three months, and it doesn’t even have to be pain 24/7. I think many people think of people with chronic pain as an older lady with a cane and having trouble to walk. I guess you could look at the picture above and some of you might say that the older woman has pain. Maybe she doesn’t have pain, she maybe has a problem with the balance and need the cane for balance.

I think actually no one of them thought of me as a person who lives with long term pain until I started to talk about it in public. Most of us who lives with long term pain doesn’t mention it very often. When someone asks me how I’m doing, I’m not telling them that I have pain, unless I have a really bad day having trouble to walk. The pain is a part of us but we don’t want to be defined by the pain.
I don’t know anyone who likes to talk about their pain, it is something that most people don’t want to be associated with. And for women it is even harder to get the right diagnose and to be taken seriously. I hope it’s getting better, but as everything else regarding women’s health we’re not there yet.

About 20% of the population lives with long term pain, not everyone is diagnosed with this and therefore not counted in the statistics so I think there is quite a large number of hidden statistics that we don’t see.

No one wants to live with pain and the impact it has on our physical and mental health, but we shouldn’t have to be ashamed and neglected by doctors, physiotherapists, families, friends and employers! I am tired of hearing people talk about us as whining old ladies!

I want to break the stigma about long term pain. Stop the shaming and let’s talk about it!
Join me in my free live webinar about how to be the CEO of long term pain. Register here!

See you soon,
Cattis